Work, Play, Work

Playing is an important part of a child’s development. As they play they learn the run and jump and skip. As well as learn communication and other social skills. Yes, not many people would question wither playing was good for children but what about work? There are many laws that prohibit child labor and because of that I think people get the idea that if kids do anything other than play they will be in great suffering so we should avoid it at all costs. Of course, I am not suggesting that our young children go into the work force again that is harmful and that’s why we have laws against it but there is still work to be done in all of our live. My dad uses to say to us “work, play, work” and he would give the example of having a party. First you have to set us the plan it, set it up, etc. that part is the first work. Then you have the party that’s the play and finally you clean up after the party, that would be the second work. Many of us have a very negative view of work and we pass this on to our children but is this type of work really all that bad?

Imagine in this situation of a party if you only had your child have fun and play at the party but don’t have them help set up or help clean up. On top of that you complain about how much work it is to have a party for your child and how you hate to clean up after them and wish the mess would disappear all by its self. What type of message do you think you send to your child. Probably that cleaning is not something they want to do or something they should do begrudgingly. They may also feel like they are a burden and that you would be happier if they were not there being a burden to you. Now think of the same situation. Your child is having a little party for let’s say a birthday party. This time you involve your child is working to help clean up the house for the expected guests and let them know they are a big help and you need them. After the fun and games, you give them age appropriate ways to help and clean. This child is much more likely to feel pride for helping others to have a good time they will also know that you value them and their help. It also gives an opportunity to talk as your cleaning and preparing that you wouldn’t have if you had done it alone. It can be an amazing experience.

I remember some of my favorite childhood memories were when I was working together side by side with my family and my siblings. We each had different tasks to do and we all felt important and wanted. And even though they were tedious and often repeated tasks we practiced our creativity to make it more fun. For us we had what we liked to call worker bees. It was really just a name but even just the fun name and imagining I was an important part of my hive made work an enjoyable experience. I will always look back with fondness to these memories. Along with this work it is important that as a parent you don’t try to give monetary incentive to work. This is very likely to make them feel like an employee instead of an important part of a home as well and lower their desire to help. People who are given money for simple tasks find less joy in doing them. In essences it takes away their motivation from inside them and makes them only want to help when they are motivated by outside sources.

I believe in the importance in having your kids work. It helps them feel important and needed as well as teaches them important teach building skills and an opportunity to use their imagination and creativity. As well as the amazing opportunities to help and have deep conversations working side by side in a job that may take time but not mental exertion. These can be amazing bonding times with the ones we love.